Currently

I'm sitting here on our loveseat, while Kyle is in the kitchen attempting to make homemade tomato soup. I say attempting, because neither of us knows how it's going to turn out, and also he's making it from watching a video recipe. I am not sure if he's even using measurements. But so far it smells good, so there's that. Also, yesterday, I attempted to be a homemaker by making chocolate chip zucchini bread. It tastes good, but took a lot longer in the oven than it was supposed to, resulting in a hard crust. And I also put in a lot of chocolate chips (Kyle said it was too many) and most of them sunk to the bottom, become part of that crust. So... That was kind of a fail. The recipe itself is really good though, and I've made it in muffins before, so I think I'll stick with muffins. My breads (pumpkin, zucchini) always turn out soggy and undercooked in the middle no matter what I do. So. Muffins it is!



I'm currently 18 weeks along, and we find out the gender of our baby next week. I'm hoping it's still alive in there. I know that sounds weird, but I legitimately worry that it' snot going to make it. I'm paranoid, I guess you could say. Although I have been feeling what I think is the baby move. And also my belly is growing, so all signs point to a living baby. During the anatomy scan is when they check baby out and make sure it is growing properly and healthily so I hope everything looks good. Of course, even if our baby is not 100% healthy, we will love it and care for it and raise it. Don't you worry about that.


I'm really happy to be able to do stuff again instead of sitting  on the couch feeling sick to my stomach 24/7. Thanks, first trimester for ending.


In NON BABY  news, we go to California in 3 weeks. I'm am mainly so excited to see my freaking cute niece and my twin baby boys! Obviously they are nephews, not mine, and they are two, so not babies, but whatever. I love them so much. Oh. And see Blaine and Brooke, too. And eat at Chick-Fil-A. AND THEN we get to go to Anaheim, and Disneyland, and Ayisha is coming to meet us and it will be SO FUN. As you can tell by my excessively use of caps.


So. There's an update for this companion blog of mine that no one reads. But I am really glad I have it. Except sometimes I forget that it exists, so sorry, blog.

Some Thoughts on the "Ordain Women" Movement

I keep trying to organize my thoughts about this whole "Ordain Women" movement. And I'm having a really hard time. For the  most part, I don't agree with what they are doing. BUT I do feel for the women who are genuinely trying to find their place in this church. I wrote a blog post here on my other blog about how I felt sad about the wear pants to church event. I have a few acquaintances who are struggling and I have read their blog and facebook posts and am trying to understand their point of view. Granted,  I think there are also some in the  movement who are just trying to rile people up, but not all of them are that way.

I read this article today, and would definitely recommend it. I think the author makes some good points.

The founder of the movement says that women are ready for the priesthood. To which I respond, I am sure not! It is only a handful of women who are involved in this movement, and who are they to speak for the whole body of women of the Church? I also think, even if they/we think we are ready, Heavenly Father really knows if we are, He is all knowing, and keeps some doctrine from us that He knows we aren't ready to learn and do yet.

He (the author of the article I linked above) quotes a Church News writer, who in turn quotes Elder Ballard. I'd like to write the quote, here. (Phrases in quotation marks are the words of Elder Ballard.) (Bolded emphasis is my own.)

Men and women have different but equally valued roles. Just as a woman cannot conceive a child without a man, so a man cannot fully exercise the power of the priesthood to establish an eternal family without a woman. In the eternal perspective, both the procreative power and the priesthood power are shared by a husband and wife. . . . “Why are men ordained to the priesthood offices and not women? . . . When all is said and done, the Lord has not revealed why He has organized His Church as He has.” Women are integral to the governance and work of the Church. “Let us not forget that approximately one-half of all of the teaching that takes place in the Church is done by sisters. . . . Much of the leadership provided is from our sisters.”

Men and women are equal in God’s eyes and in the eyes of the Church, but equal does not mean that they are the same. Although responsibilities and divine gifts of men and women differ in their nature, they do not differ in their importance or influence. “It takes a man and a woman to create a family, and it takes men and women to carry out the work of the Lord in the Church.”

When men and women go to the temple, they are both endowed with the same power, which is by definition priesthood power. “All who enter the house of the Lord officiate in the ordinances of the priesthood. This applies to men and women alike.”

That is what I believe. I believe that we are all equal, but that equal does not mean "the same". I believe that both the procreative power and the priesthood power must and is shared between a man and a woman, husband and wife. We learn so much in the Temple, and I believe that this is taught there. Some say that women do not have authority in the Church. I don't believe that. Women carry many leadership roles, and have for years. Again, we have different roles, but we can all be leaders. He also quotes Sheri Dew, and I loved what she had to say. (Again, bolded emphasis is my own.)

“Sisters, some will try to persuade you that because you are not ordained to the priesthood, you have been shortchanged. They are simply wrong, and they do not understand the gospel of Jesus Christ. The blessings of the priesthood are available to every righteous man and woman. We may all receive the Holy Ghost, obtain personal revelation, and be endowed in the temple, from which we emerge ‘armed’ with power. The power of the priesthood heals, protects, and inoculates all of the righteous against the powers of darkness. Most significantly, the fullness of the priesthood contained in the highest ordinances of the house of the Lord can be received only by a man and woman together.”

We need to work together, in our different roles, and help and lean on each other.

Some have said, maybe the Lord or the Church leaders haven't revealed or asked about certain things because they have not been asked. I can see that logic, to a degree. Our Church was brought back to the Earth because a 14 year old boy had a question and took it to His Father in prayer. A majority of the sections in the Doctrine and Covenants came from Saints asking questions of Joseph Smith. But that doesn't necessarily mean that that is how revelation always comes. We believe and sustain Thomas S Monson and his counselors as prophets, seers, and revelators. Is is, essentially, their job to communicate with the Lord and teach us His doctrine. It is our job to listen and believe and do what they ask, because they speak as if they were God.

I am not saying that asking questions is wrong. Asking questions can be a huge part of the building up of our own testimony. But we do not need to nit-pick at every little thing in our history or in the doctrine, or wonder why something is or is not the way we would like it to be. That is when we must exercise FAITH and believe that we will some day learn and know all these things as God knows it. We are simply not ready for it, here in our mortal bodies, with our mortal mind. We are not able to comprehend all things right now, nor do we need to.

I am also not saying that we need to be complacent. I am not suggesting that we ideally sit by, or that we blindly follow the prophet. What I am saying is that we need to exercise our faith, and gain testimony of the truths we do have on the Earth today, and that we should follow those truths and doctrines to the best of our abilities.
The author of the article quotes this phrase, "Never lose faith in the things you know, because of the things you don't know."
I know there are many questions yet to be answered, and many things that have not yet been revealed to us, but we must "trust in the Lord with all [our hearts] and lean not under [our] own understanding."


I want to close with the quote that this author closed with, which is one I had never heard before. In his notes he cites it from a devotional given at BYU in 2010, by Elder Glenn L. Pace.

“Sisters, I testify that when you stand in front of your heavenly parents in those royal courts on high and you look into Her eyes and behold Her countenance, any question you ever had about the role of women in the kingdom will evaporate into the rich celestial air, because at that moment you will see standing directly in front of you, your divine nature and destiny.”

How beautiful. We need not worry about what the world thinks about our "inequality", we need not worry about sameness. We have different roles for a reason. But together, we can be made perfect in God, and go on to create our own worlds, with our spouses, together. And that is really what all this is about.

A caveat:
Some will say, what about women who are unable to bear children, or who don't have the opportunity to get married in this life? To them I say, our God is a just and merciful God. He will make all things right. Though those trials may be hard in this life, if we keep the commandments and keep our covenants, God WILL make things right. No ifs, ands or buts. If you don't believe that, you do not understand the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

One more note:
Our stake president in Pocatello spoke on the equality of men and women, and women's divine nature, in the Church twice while I was in the stake. One of my favorite things he said is that because of women's divine nature we are LITERAL partners of Heavenly Father. He didn't delve into that, but I think it is a beautiful thing. He then said that before men can be literal partners, they must be set apart with the priesthood. Again, he didn't go deep into that but he also said that we make covenants in the Temple, by the priesthood, and we are then in partnership with our husband - and with the priesthood. Even though our husband's "hold" the priesthood, they CANNOT have eternal life without us. We are partners in every sense of the word.

GATSBY

I finally saw Gatsby. It came to the dollar theater the week I was moving, so I was able to go to a late night showing of it with Shae. 

HOLY COW IT WAS SO GOOD.

Brief side note:

Back in the Titanic days, I didn't love Leo. You know how he used to be called Leo DeCRAPrio? Guilty. Don't hate on me. (And let's be honest I still loved the crap out of Titanic, because really, it's Titanic.) But I didn't love him. I thought he was kind of weird and awkward looking and had no love. THEN Inception came out in... Looking it up... 2010?! And I fell in love. With him and Joseph Gordon-Levitt. I love Inception so much you don't even know. Anyway. Ever since then I've really enjoyed him and his movies, even his old stuff. Ok.

So. Even when I just heard of the casting I thought it was perfect, and then the trailer came out and I was floored. And then seeing the movie was incredible. I loved how they never showed Gatsby's face until the party and he turns around and there are fireworks and he just is perfect and I loved it so much.

Everything that had to do with Gatsby was perfect in this film. Leo could do no wrong. He got every emotion, every phrase, perfect. It was an impeccable performance. Wow.

Moving on to other aspects I enjoyed. I REALLY liked Carey Mulligan as Daisy. She did a great job as well. Some people think that Daisy is a shallow, easy to play character, and while I agree to some degree... I think there is a little more to Daisy than that and I think Carey did a great job in her acting that portrayed a little of her under the surface personality and emotions.

Let's be honest I enjoyed MOST of the characters. Tom was great, as was Jordan. All the other more minor characters were wonderful as well.

The only weakness to this masterpiece? 

Tobey Maguire. I've never loved him. He is not attractive, has a strange voice, and strange acting tendencies. He looks like a lost and/or bewildered puppy the majority of the film and I just didn't love him. It's a shame he's the narrator. But, I suppose I didn't love him too much in the book, either, so that's how it goes. No matter how much I didn't enjoy that casting - it didn't really bring down the movie for me. 

I suppose the only other thing I didn't enjoy from the movie was the directly borrowing of scenes from Moulin Rouge!. I love that movie. I understand that both films are made by Baz Luhrman and so there will be similarities but the scenes of Nick furiously typing away direct bring back images of Christian doing the same. I didn't love that.

I understand why they did what they did with the story (i.e. put Nick in a sanitarium) and I can appreciate that, although it is in no way part of the book.

I loved the parties. Oh, the parties. I loved the music. It was perfect and chilling and wonderful. 

I so enjoyed the scene of (SPOILER) Gatsby's death - inlaid with the phone calls, that show up to his death he had hope for Daisy and her call. Perfect.

I might mention that we read this book in my honors English class, junior year. Mr. Rich was a young, energetic teacher, and we loved him. He brought the story to life, and, let's be honest, we analyzed the crap out of it. I've loved it ever since, and each time I read it I love it more and get more out of it. I think this film did it great justice, and really pulls you into the book and shows it to you, which shouldn't a great film adaptation do? After all, the text of The Great Gatsby is mostly text and description, and this movie, again, captured all the little details and really made you see the book. 

I will stop with my typing and leave it at this.

I loved this movie. It lived up to my expectations. I would give it an A rating for sure. (Perhaps an A-, for the sheer fact that Tobey Maguire is in it.)

(Also, if you haven't read the book and don't know what to expect, I can't promise you you'll
like it. I just can't.)

BTW - HERE is a great review that I would recommend, I really enjoyed it.

Also, if you like YA lit as well as The Great Gatsby, you should check out the book Jake, Reinvented, by Gordon Korman. It's a loose modern day adaptation of Gatsby, set in a high school. It's worth a read.

Some Ramblings

I haven't written in a while, blah, blah, blah.
This is my random blog, so it's ok.



....

Cory Monteith died. Yes, homeboy from GLEE. Finn Hudson, I love you. I am so so sad. I think they said it looks like an OD, and he only got out of rehab in April and what is everyone going to do without Cory... Or without Finn? Glee will never be the same again.


Oh, and by the way. Kyle and I are moving. To Coeur d'Alene. In two weeks. Whaaaaaaaa??? I am so excited and grateful he got a job, but what is going on? We still need to find a place to live. And I'm trying to see all my bff peeps before we go. And we're going to Utah. And we also planned a trip to Jackson and Yellowstone the week/end before we move because we're cool like that. SO MANY THINGS TO DO. But it will be awesome.
And luckily my BFF Isha is willing to pay for a flight to come see me. So that's awesome. I love her.


I love Sonic shakes. Like so much, you don't even know. Kyle "made" me walk to the pillars last night (if you don't know what they are, that's ok, just know it's a bit of a hike up a mountain) and I almost died. But not really, I can do hard things, y'all.
But then Shaeli came and got me and we got shakes and had girl time and freaked out over Grey's and it was wonderful and what am I going to do without my shake and girl time?
I will make new friends.
I'm quite practiced at that.


I just want to find a (good) place to liveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

"A Field of Players"

Remember the time I posted this and said that I would have to find my paper comparing soccer to dating? Well, I found it.

Please enjoy this little gem.


"A Field of Players"

The air is fresh, the players are ready and the goal is in sight. The opportune moment is now. There are many players, it is a team sport. But only one man can win, only one man can make the goal. In this game, emotions go haywire. In the beginning you're excited. By the end you don't care anymore. And the middle? It's up and down like a roller coaster. One day, one play, everything is wonderful, but the next moment is awful and you feel like you have lost everything.

You push, push, push, harder than ever. The goal is what is most important. The emotion is high, the air alive with electricity - and then, failure. She didn't talk to you, your focus wavers. But it comes back into focus quickly; if you want her, you will have her. The game continues to be played.

Flying up and down the field you wait for the moment to get close, you shoot, and you score. The goal is in, the game is won. But come tomorrow? Tomorrow, all of this will be a memory from which you will retreat. For once the goal is made, the game won, nothing matters but the next game, the next goal, the next girl.



It is silly as all get out, but I have to say, I'm pretty proud of that piece of writing.

Gatsby

This is the facebook message I just sent to my BFF, Sarah.


"Also this has nothing to do with you BUT TODAY IS APPARENTLY THE LAST DAY TO SEE GATSBY IN THE REGULAR THEATER IN POCATELLO AND THERE'S NOT A DATE POSTED WHEN IT'S GOING TO THE DOLLAR THEATER AND DAMN ALL YOU IDAHOANS WHO DIDN'T WANT TO SEE IT AND MAKE IT LAST MORE THAN 20 DAYS IN THE THEATER
and I miss you."


I love her. We get each other.

And seriously, WTF Idaho.

Taylor... Oh, Taylor

I'm sitting here watching the Billboard Music Awards, and T Swift just performed.... And. Well, I'll come right out and say it. I have a problem with her.

Let's step back in time for a minute, back to 2006 when I first heard her. The first song I ever heard was "I'd Lie". My dear friend Corey had me listen to it in Mr. Cramer's photo class. I loved it. I thought it was great. Then when "Tim McGraw" came out, I was hooked. I own her first CD. I think it's great.

And then.....
"Fearless" came out and I was pleasantly surprised.
"Speak Now" was pretty good as well.
And "Red" has some catchy things.



BUT.
Some of the songs are so annoying. Some of the lyrics are terrible. Taylor's voice hasn't matured, in fact, I'm pretty sure it's gotten worse. Her live performances are terrible and weird.
She got all famous and always looks SO SHOCKED when she wins awards. But when she doesn't win awards she looks PISSED and like she could kill anyone who took her award away from her.
I know I don't know her personally.... But she seems like a brat.

Don't tell me I'm jealous. I'm not.
Other than the fact that I'm pretty sure I can sing better than her and WTF is she famous?

But then a new song comes out and I learn all the lyrics and belt it out and feel so ashamed of myself but then I buy it and  I hate her more because I'm putting money in her pocket and.... It's a big nasty shame spiral.
Yep.

Also, some of her song sound like she's still in high school.
Get over that shiz.

(Epiphany: Maybe that's why she annoys me so much. She didn't exactly grow up in her music since I first heard her my senior year of high school. I grew up, went to college, got married.... And she's still singing about who knows what happened in high school.)



PS: I'd never date her (if I were a boy) because we'd break up and she'd go all crazy-town and write a song about me.

Missionaries

I haven't been waiting for a missionary for 4 years, and I've obviously never been the missionary, but it still baffles me when I hear about boys "dear janeing" the girl back home right before they get home (right before meaning 1, 2, 3 months before).

Who in their right mind would write to a girl for 23 months, and then decide to not anymore. I don't understand it. Absolutely crazy.

I mean, ok. I understand that feelings change. I understand that feelings are hurt on both sides all the times, during all stages of waiting. But who writes a girl for almost two years, saying that he loves her and wants to be with her when he gets home, and then randomly decides.... well, nevermind. Ridiculous.


That aside.

I thought about writing a post about waiting for a missionary... But that will have to wait.

Favorite Quotes

"Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if 
one only remembers to turn on the light."

"It is our choices who show what we truly are, 
far more than our abilities."

Both courtesy of JK Rowling via Albus Dumbledore

"Laughter is sunshine, it chases winter from the human face."

Victor Hugo

"Love wins, love always wins."

"Love is the only rational act."

Both from Tuesdays with Morrie, by Mitch Albom

"A self is not something static.... It is always becoming."

Madeleine L'Engle

"It is only with the heart that one can see rightly. 
What is essential is invisible to the eye."

From The Little Prince, by Antoine de Saint-Exupery

"I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness 
because it shows me the stars."

Og Mandino

"No matter what people tell you, words and ideas can change the world."
From the movie Dead Poets Society

"Everywhere in nature we are taught the lessons of patience and waiting. We want things a long time before we get them, and the fact that we want them for a long time makes them all the more precious when they come."

Joseph F. Smith

In Memorium

I already wrote a post about my dear cousin Katrina here.

Feel free to read it.

My beautiful cousin gave her life for her little one, and will be greatly missed.

My Life Story

My friend is doing a blog challenge during the month of May, and I thought I'd hop on board, to some extent, at least. I'm not going to post every day, and I probably won't post about every topic, but I figured it would give me some interesting topics to blog about.
I'm still debating if I'm going to do any of it on my other blog. I probably will.
Let's be honest.... There are no rules in the blogosphere.

First Day//Your Life Story in 250 Words or Less (but who's counting.....)

// Born in Clearwater, Florida, 24 years ago. 
// Parents divorced when I was a year old and Mom and I moved to Utah.
// Went to Manilla Elementary in Pleasant Grove for K-1, Wasatch Elementary in Provo for 2-6. Met my first besties, Lexi in 3rd grade and Dani in 5th.
// Went to Lakeridge Jr High for 7th, Lehi Jr High for 8th and 9th. Met my bestie Ayisha in 7th grade. My time in jr high is a blur of crushes, boy bands, and sleepovers.
// Jr high was also a time of step-family drama.
// Went to Lehi High for 10th, Mountain View High for 11th and 12th. High school was a time of boyfriends, first kisses, school dances, concerts, and dancing.
// Spent two amazing summers laying the foundation of my testimony of the LDS church.
// Moved 9 times before moving out for college.
// Went to BYU with my heart set on one boy, met a great boy my sophomore year, got engaged to that great boy my junior year, and got married the summer before my senior year. 
// Joined a group on facebook that consisted entirely of girls waiting for missionaries, and met some of my best friends there.
// Met life long friends in my single's ward, including a bishop who was like a father to me.
// Graduated from BYU with a BS in Family Life and Human Development at age 21.
// Moved to Pocatello, Idaho with my awesome husband for him to go to graduate school, and here we are!

Body Image and Exercise

I had this goal to start doing the 30 day shred this week. But you know, then that time of the month happened and that goal went out the window.

Let's talk about body image for a minute.

We're surrounded and bombarded by images of what is "pretty" and "acceptable".
I will be the first to say I've been taken in by them.

I have never really subscribed to the weight thing. I mean, I think it's important to be within a healthy weight range, but I definitely don't think that you need to be ruled by your "number".

Anywayyyyy.
I go through these phases. One when I wish I was a lot skinnier (think high school days), one when I like myself just the way I am, and a bunch of others.
The point being, I am really going to get my booty into gear and lose some weight. Ok, scratch that, lose some inches. I'm the laziest person I know (seriously) and so it's going to take a lot of motivation and grit to actually stick to a fitness plan. Believe me, I have tried and failed many times.

(OMG JENNY YOU ARE BEING SUCH A BRAT AND STOP WITH THE DARK MAKEUP)
(Sorry, quick rant, watching Gossip Girl over here...)

There is really no point to this post.
Other than I am going to stick it to the man (or rather stick it to me) so my clothes actually hang a little more like they are supposed to :)

A Quote

I found this wonderful quote online today, and I had to share it and keep it somewhere. 

There is so much negative portrayal of motherhood nowadays, and I thought this quote was beautiful.

Motherhood is not a hobby, it is a calling. You do not collect children because you find them cuter than stamps. It is not something to do if you can squeeze the time in. 
It is what God gave you time for.

Christian mothers carry their children in hostile territory. When you are in public with them, you are standing with, and defending, the objects of cultural dislike. You are publicly testifying that you value what God values, and that you refuse to value what the world values. You stand with the defenseless and in front of the needy. You represent everything that our culture hates, because 
you represent laying down your life for another—and laying down your life 
for another represents the gospel.

Trials

My heart has been heavy, recently.

I was laid off. We will not be getting the two paychecks that are due (about $2000 worth). Because the company is closing, Kyle will not be working there. So, now, we do not know what we are going to do, or where we will be going to in 5 weeks time.
And I"m ok with that. It's hard, but we will get through.
It was "good" timing, as good as timing can go in a situation like this.


But on top of that, my dear best friend's husband left her last Friday. I went to stay with her for a few days. My heart broke (and continues to break) for her. She is also is diagnosed with bipolar and anxiety disorders. The days I were there were a roller coaster, but I am so glad I was there for her. I love her.

And then, on top of that, another dear friend of mine lost her baby two days ago, at 34 weeks along. My dear friend had to go in, be induced, and give birth to a perfect little girl, who had already departed from this life.


I know many other people are struggling with trials and difficulties right now, but those are the recent few that are weighing on my mind.

My heart is heavy. I feel tired.
I know that God is there, that He will "bind up the brokenhearted" (Is. 61:1) and "He healeth the broken in heart, and binds up their wounds"(Psalm 147:3) and that is my Testimony.

"My dear brothers and sisters, there will be days and nights when you feel overwhelmed, when your hearts are heavy and your heads hang down. Then, please remember, Jesus Christ, the Redeemer, is the Head of this Church. It is His gospel.... My dear friends, the Savior heals the broken heart and binds up your wounds (Psalm 147:3). Whatever your challenges may be, wherever you live on this earth, your faithful membership in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and the divine powers of the gospel of Jesus Christ will bless you to endure joyfully to the end."

Elder Uchtdorf, October Conference 2007

What's In A Name?

Names.

We all have them.

We don't choose them (generally).

Sometimes they mean something, sometimes they don't.

Let's talk about my name.

My first name: Brittanny.

Not Brittany, Brittney, Brittni, Britnay, or anything else.

B. R. I. T. T. A. N. N. Y.

Technically, it's supposed to be pronounced in 3 syllables.

Brit-tin-ny.

Like the word (country) Brittain, with a y on the end.

If you know me, you know my mom is from England.

Great Britain.

Makes sense, right?

My mom originally wanted to spell it "Brittainy", but thought I would get called Britt-tain(rhymes-with-gain)-y. Which doesn't sound so nice.

My mom thought she was being originally when she came up with that name.

Except.... It ended up being in like the top five names of 1989.

Whaddaya do?

Now, my middle name is Hope.

Hope is pretty. I love it. It's a great virtue.

My dad blessed me to always have a "hope in our Savior Jesus Christ" when I was little, and I love that my name ties into that blessing.

(By-the-by, here are other names that were considered by my parents:
Felicity Hope: Grandma G deemed that too Catholic, so that was out. When I was younger I was really hurt that I didn't get named that. I really wanted to be a Felicity. Probably has something to do with my obsession with American Girl dolls at the time.....

Holly Lynn: If I was born in December. I was born in August, so that didn't cut it. Lynn is also my dad's middle name.

Chelsea Lynn: If I was a blonde. I was not. I had a thick head of black hair, Chelsea is also an area of London. And again with the Lynn.

Richard "Ricky" Lynn and Benjamin Dee were the winners for boy  names.)

I think I'll stick with Brittanny :)

Update: I thought I'd tell you - when I introduce myself, I say Britt-ney. Two syllables. My mom hates it. Also, most people just call me Britt.
So, you know... Britt's a pretty cool name.

Gay Rights

This is my blog, and I'll say what I want to.


I support gay marriage.
There, I said it, out loud.

The Church said this, yesterday:
We firmly support the divinely appointed definition of marriage as the union between a man and a woman because it is the single most important institution for strengthening children, families, and society.

I believe that with my whole heart.

So how and why do I support gay marriage, when I also believe what the Church says?
I'm still trying to figure that out.

Here's what I think.
Partners in same-sex relationships should definitely be granted the same rights as spouse in heterosexual marriages.
(This is where I do not know enough about the differences between marriages and civil unions...)
I think anyone should be with who they love (within reason... no animals, please).


Let me put this out there: my dad is gay.
I love my dad. I love his partner. I want them to be happy. Because I love them.
So, I support gay rights.
I support gay marriage.


But, people that think it's just about love, you're wrong.
No one is saying that people shouldn't be with those they love.
It's not about intolerance, either.
No one is saying that they hate gays.
(Well, they are, but shouldn't be, and I won't go into that here...)

I think when politics get involved, lines get blurred and overthought, and things that don't matter somehow end up added into the whole equation.
And it's messy.

I've heard some members of the Church that are upset because if gay marriage is legalized, than perhaps in the US temple marriages will not be recognized as legalized marriage ceremonies any more - meaning that a couple will have to have a civil ceremony, and then get sealed (like they do in other countries, England for example).
I get that that is frustrating.
I also get that we are so close to the end.
The Second Coming.
If that happens, it is probably just another sign.
And members of the Church can deal with having to have a civil ceremony and then a temple sealing. Members of the Church already do that.

Has this post left anyone completely confused about my thoughts?
Probably.
But it still felt good to type out.

I know I am not the only person who is LDS, who struggles with this.
I believe in love, I believe in equality, but I also believe in the Church and it's teachings.
It is a fine line, and is getting even finer.
I know for a fact that the Church will never change their stance on this.
I know that.
I accept that, I support that.


Maybe I am standing on the fence.
Maybe I am damning myself.
Maybe I am not showing my support in either direction.
Maybe others will think that I am being dumb, or unsupportive, or uncaring.

I don't care.
In my heart of hearts I support the LDS faith and it's stance on gay marriage, and marriage in general, for that matter.
And I also support gay rights.
I will continue learning and going forward in faith.
Maybe I will go forward quietly until I learn a little more of myself.
But I will go forward.


By the way, you should read this article:
http://www.thepublicdiscourse.com/2013/03/9432/#.UT4lr1f6jLl.facebook

Also, this was my friend's status today and I loved:
..... knows she should probably be more politically charged at a time like this, but she is shamefully more concerned at how poorly her NCAA bracket's doing...

On Soccer

Last night a world cup qualifier game was on, Mexico vs USA and Kyle wanted to watch. Confession: soccer bores me to tears. I watch the World Cup, because hey, it's the  World Cup but other than that.... No thank you.
That's not to say I hate soccer.
I dated two soccer players in high school and went to my fair share of games. I guess it's true of any sport - if it's your team, and people you know are playing, you enjoy it more. Plus the soccer field for high school games is not as huge as pro games, so it's easier to keep track of where the heck the ball is.

As a side note, my junior year of high school we had to write a metaphor paper in my English class. One of my said soccer playing boyfriends had broken up with me recently, so I wrote a paper comparing a soccer game to dating; how it was just a game to the players.
It was awesome.

Next time I go to my mom's I'll have to dig it out and then post it for your enjoyment.

On Naming a Blog

First, the blog address, which is "my-dashboard-confessionals". 

If you know me at all, you know that my favorite band of all time is Dashboard Confessionals. I thought it fitting that I name my blog after them.... Their name comes from their song 'The Sharp Hint of New Tears' when it says "on the way home, this car hears my confessions...."

I'll let this blog be my "confessional" of sorts. 

As for the title - "This Is How It Goes, Baby" comes from a song by another of my favorite song artists, Missy Higgins. In case you were wondering, the rest of the lyrics go like this:

This is how it goes, baby

I get angry at your words and I go home

But you won't come after me,

Because I'll be back before you know, you know

The lyrics don't really have anything to why I choose them, I just like how it sounds.

The Beginning

This will be a companion blog, of sorts, to Kyle and my's blog. It might have a few more random posts, that don't really need to be shared on our family blog.

We'll see how long this lasts, and how it goes!